Migration can be a pressure test for marriages. A Hong Kong woman who immigrated to the UK recently shared online that the local Hong Kong migrant community is riddled with relationship issues — divorces and affairs are reportedly common, and extramarital partners are often fellow Hongkongers.
"Maybe couples just find each other more unbearable after moving here," she wrote, adding that immigration is a major test for life, relationships, health, and finances.
"Counseling in the UK Isn't Easy"
The woman, who claims to be a family counselor for Hongkongers in the UK, posted on social media platform Threads, saying that her phone rings non-stop with people seeking help, from the elderly to teenagers. Many struggle to adapt to life in the UK.
She noted that the most frequent issues come from people in their 30s and 40s, highlighting problems such as:
- Spending too much time together after migration
- Unequal division of housework
- Difficulty adjusting to new family roles
Extramarital Affairs Widespread
She revealed that affairs are particularly common, especially among couples in long-distance relationships. She cited examples where:
- The wife stays in the UK with the children while the husband remains in Hong Kong to work.
- After two years apart, the husband files for divorce—sometimes unilaterally—once the legal time frame allows.
Even couples who both live in the UK are reportedly cheating on each other, often with other Hongkongers they meet locally.
"It seems easier to feel emotionally empty here than in Hong Kong," she wrote. "I personally know two people who were cheated on. Maybe being here just makes people more critical of their partners."
She added that she's heard many similar stories from friends and acquaintances, suggesting the issue might be more widespread than people assume.
"Migration Is a Test for Everything"
She concluded by saying that immigration truly tests every aspect of life — relationships, health, and finances. However, she clarified that many of the cases she referenced were shared with her by a friend who is a family counselor:
"I'm not the one answering all those calls. I'm not qualified to handle them directly," she explained.
Netizens Share Similar Stories
Her post struck a chord with many Hongkongers living in the UK, who chimed in with their own observations and experiences:
- One said a wife had an affair within two years of arriving and made excuses to stop her husband from joining her in the UK. The affair was eventually exposed by her remorseful mother.
- Another said they'd heard of several couples where either the husband or wife cheated with fellow Hongkongers.
- One woman shared that she came to the UK alone first, planning for her ex to join later, but he cut off all contact within two months.
"Adapting Isn't Easy"
Some commenters acknowledged that immigration brings enormous change, and adapting as a couple is not easy:
"Husbands and wives need to learn to share housework and support each other. When both are struggling to adapt to a new life but fail to be patient with each other, friction is inevitable."
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