Opinion | The world's dumbest diplomat
By Philip Yeung, university teacher
PKY480@gmail.com
Boris is never boring. He can always be counted on to say the wrong thing in the wrong place at the wrong time. He is incomplete without his comedy of errors. That is his personal brand. But his gaffes are not always funny. In the latest outbreak of Borisitis, he was invited to speak at a recent major Asian business event in Singapore, where he promptly ruffled a lot of feathers by launching into another anti-China tirade, calling it a "coercive autocracy", forgetting that he was no longer in Britain playing to his base. Here in the East, China enjoys a cozy relationship with its neighbors who are much more favorably disposed towards this cuddly giant.
That is the risk every sponsor runs every time Boris is bagged as a keynote speaker. He arrives with his razzle dazzle, and irrespective of circumstances, instantly gives his host a headache. This time, Mike Bloomberg, the billionaire host was forced to apologize for the gauche spoutings of this loose cannon.
Boris Johnson in Britain and Donald Trump in America present western-style democracy with a dilemma that is becoming a curse. Both take sovereignty of the self to the edge. What they say and do is all about themselves, never about their country or humanity.
In the totem pole of fools, Boris and Trump are co-favorites at the top. But in the domain of foreign affairs, Boris stands alone as the ambassador of disaster, constantly testing the outer limits of appropriateness. Granted, he is an incomparable, one-in-a-billion genius who can create a buzz simply by tousling his hair.
Boris is the exclusive product of an exclusive Eton education that produces insensitive snobs. Recently, Eton boys received a slap on the wrist for jeering at visiting girls from a nearby state-run school, hurling racist and misogynist slurs at children not considered their social equals. Eton boys, like Boris or Jacob Rees-Mogg, colorfully described as "that member for 18th century", have never outgrown their sense of superiority.
The world has never seen a foreign minister as gaffe-prone as Boris. His brief stint as Britain's top diplomat before becoming prime minister had left a trail of disaster too long for an article. Most memorably, he once remarked that people in Papua New Guinea (PNG) have now learned to dine together instead of on each other, calling up its cannibalistic past. For that clever insult, he was almost PNGed by PNG, (or declared Persona Non Grata by Papua New Guinea)---the ultimate punishment for undiplomatic behavior.
Next, he mocked Malaysian women saying that their increasing numbers in college are due to girls looking for husbands. Boris' inventiveness knows no limits when dishing out racial or sexist insults.
Somehow, event organizers are willing to indulge him for "Boris being Boris" as the entertainer supreme, paying him princely sums just to shock the world with his words. Before the Bloomberg-sponsored event, Boris was paid about $300,000 US plus expenses for his appearance before a gathering of American insurance agents. For generating media buzz, Boris is the reliable box office, hogging the headlines at the drop of a hat. He is the undisputed media darling.
But not all of Boris' gaffes are harmless. Some have nasty consequences as in the case of the British-Iranian journalist who languished six long years in jail for alleged espionage because of a slip of the tongue by then-UK foreign minister Boris. His casual remark that she was there to train Iranian journalists was taken as proof by the local court that she was surreptitiously working against the Iranian government. Before he opens his mouth, Boris doesn't do details. He is allowed to flip-flop his way through life, fact-free, and gets paid handsomely for it. But we are entitled to ask: Where is the beef? Is democracy now just an endless show of comedy?
But it's nice being Boris, where you can live life on your terms. You are valued for your authenticity, however ridiculous it looks. Having an Eton education helps, and so does having a mop of blond hair. His many madcap moments let him laugh all the way to the bank. Who needs competence? Who needs intellect? Who needs blood, sweat and tears?
The views do not necessarily reflect those of DotDotNews.
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